Days of rest - Biggest Loser

I've lost track of the days but today is March 8th :)
So I consciously took off Saturday, Sunday and Monday (Monday wasn't really planned but it happened that way) from working out after working out 6 days straight, but got back to it tonight and went back to an old standby - the treadmill.

After reading back over my old journal I noticed that I was doing alot on the treadmill even after I started at the gym I always warmed up with the treadmill for awhile first and I was having good success with losing weight.

I only did 2 miles but I did include some inclines and did some jogging and running too.  I felt like I could do more and not sure why I didn't.  I definately need to get in to see my doctor and get the go ahead from him to push myself without worrying about a heart attack. 

Not sure why but I've always wanted to be a runner.  However, I've never felt comfortable running because of my weight.  Thinking people would see me and say "don't bother" or "look at her, she looks ridiculous" also I worried about my knees running with too much weight (I've been told by coaches not to start running until I had lost such and such pounds to save wear and tear on my knees). I wonder what Jillian Michaels would say?? Of course I don't have a staff of doctors and trainers around to watch over me, so hence my hesitation.  However, the few times that I have actually ran outside or on the treadmill (never at the gym, they had cameras and there was usually someone else there nor at home unless I was alone because I prefer no one to be around when I do) I've loved it.  I love the way it feels and I love it when I feel strong.  

I'm so anxious for spring and clear roads.  I probably still won't run in public much lol, at least not at first.  But I'm determined that by this summer, I will be running a couple of days a week and hopefully I will be able to go further than from one electricity pole to another before having to walk for a break.  By July I want to be running one mile, maybe I can do it sooner!.

I just love The Biggest Loser, they inspire me so much!  They all work hard and even though I feel partial to the black team I'm excited to see them all doing so good.

Food today:
B: protein shake
S: fruit snacks
L: PB on crackers (on a field trip and my bread at home went bad so no sandwiches), apple, pretzels
S: small sandwich from store and harvest chips
D: 1 c. pasta, chicken breast with sauce and a bit of provolone cheese
S: fudgcicle, pretzels

Alot of carbs today :(

Activity today:
44 minutes on the treadmill
approx 25 min. leg lifts and crunches

Looking forward to tomorrow and working out!

checking in March 6th

Not sure of the day lol, and too tired to go check my log book.
Soooo, I've decided not to track the weight on the scale for awhile as its just frustrating me and creating a negative energy (which will not help).  Instead, I am going to focus on living my life each day as a healthy lifestyle living person would.

The Law of Attraction works best when you focus on the end results you want and letting go of the process to get there.  The best way and fastest way to get the life you want is to start living it anyway.

Each day I will strive to make healthy choices in the foods I eat, following serving sizes not package sizes. Why do so many foods and drinks we buy in convenient stores often give you 2 to 3 servings per package - are there really many of us that will share them with one or two friends or split the contents into 2 to 3 separate containers for later servings?? Not many I'm guessing.  So all the more reason to plan my meals and carry single serving snacks with me so I'm never at the mercy of a convenience store purchase.  I will continue to drink my water and strive to increase that to be sure I stay properly hydrated.  I will try to make my workouts count more times than not.  I really do not like the word "try" but still I have to be realistic.  I'm a mom, a business owner, 42 and very much overweight - there are going to be days I just don't feel like pushing it hard and that's okay.  As long as I can tip the scale (no pun intended) in my favor the majority of the time, believe in myself, and live as if.... I will get there.

Days 60-62 ......

Day 60
B: Kashi Go Lean w/ skim
L: turkey mini burgers w/ fries and salad bar at Ruby Tuesday
S: Protein bar, String Cheese
S: Pink Lady Apple my fav :), almonds
D: Turkey Burger lol (just now getting to dinner at almost 9pm).
Think I'll actually be able to make it through the day without more chocolate (other than what covered my protein bar) that is a big accomplishment as I've been craving chocolate alot lately and been giving into it.

Workout: Jari Love Get Ripped DVD using 10, 8, 5 and 2 pound weights.   I went a little lighter on DBs for some of the sets than I've done in the past and a little heavier on some others.  I've been wondering if I over did it with my workouts a few weeks ago and that is why I got so tired and achey at times the last few weeks.  I'm feeling better now so I'm starting out a little lighter and will work my way back up.  Just because I can lift heavier doesn't mean my body wants to do a whole workout like that just starting out.  I can't wait to start feeling and seeing muscle definition :) once I get into a good groove.

Day 61:
Went to breakfast with my Dad for his birthday :)
B: eggs, homefries and toast
L: Ramen noodles (bad choice but I was running out the door :( ),
S: Pretzels, snack size snickers (ugh)
D: 2 Fajitas, Orange
S: Smoothie (yogurt and cherry)

Workout:
3 Miles Walk Away the Pounds, 30 wall pups

Day 62: I had planned to do a 24 hour fast but changed my mind after getting a divination message that I needed more calories from protein and carbs to get myself losing again.
B: Smoothie
S: RF String cheese, almonds (100 calorie pack)
L:  I planned a lite lunch of salad greens and shrimp due to the planned fast.  So by the time 2pm rolled around and I was getting to wanting lunch after deciding not to do a fast, did I go for my salad and shrimp.  NOPE I went the complete other direction and ordered Domino's pizza.  

Honestly not sure what is wrong with my head lately.  Laziness? frustration? gluttony?

I feel like I shouldn't even be blogging right now because my head is crazy with this back and forth shit, one day I'm on plan, the next I'm completely off.  One week I'm doing good with solid food and exercise, the next I'm doing two fasts and skipping a workout.  I'm saying one thing and doing another. Wanting one thing but doing actions that won't get me there.  Being hard on myself and the next making excuses.  I know better than this, I'm going crazy I swear ughhhhhhhhhh

Days 57, 58 & 59 - achey ugh

Day 57 Friday
weight: 225.2 (guess my mantra worked)

This was a weird day, snow storm, son stayed home (well he came with me to the shop for 1/2 a day then we went home).  I decided (for some reason) to do another 24 hour fast.  After doing a little more research on the website that promotes 24 hour fasts I learned that his program recommends twice a week.  I planned to start another after lunch.  I had forgotten about that and was having snacks until 4 before I remembered lol.  So I started my fast at about 4pm.  I didn't start to feel physically hungry until about 2 pm the next day. Just to be clear though, the fasts that I'm doing are not mainly for the weightloss (though that's a nice benefit if it stays off) but its mainly for the detoxing and to learn more about my relationship with food and hunger. I need to learn when my body is really physically hungry and not just when I'm stressed or bored.
I did work out for awhile.
Food:
B: Yogurt & Cherry smoothie
L: LQ pizza, protein bar, pretzels
S: Small Mocha Frappe

Workout:
Jari Love Strength Workout 30 minutes, WATP 20 minutes.  Two days later (right now) I don't remember why I cut both workouts short.  Was I tired? Interrupted?  I will have to pay attention next time to see if it had to do with being tired due to the fasting.

Day 58:
Weight 224.2 (not getting too excited because you never know how it will look tomorrow lol)
Food:
L: about 4pm Peanut Butter sandwich on WW, pretzels, apple
S: Protein Bar
D: I don't want to say (I didn't pack a dinner and I had a class until 7:30 so ate on the run after class on way to pick up my son).  I know better than this, but don't know why I am not packing a cooler for days like this.

No workout since i didn't get home till about 9:30 and after being on the go for 12 hours I was beat.

Day 59:
Food:
B: Eggs with spinach and ff cheese, 2 WW toast, skim milk
S: FF fudgcicle, pretzels
L: Big salad w/ 2 oz teriyaki steak tips
S: skim milk, cherries, 1/2 c. chocolate ice cream smoothie (um yeah I have a problem with chocolate lately, maybe I always have but lately I'm noticing it more)
D: lean turkey burger no bun, sweet potatoe fries both with ketchup
S: pretzels, Welch's fruit snacks

Workout:
WATP a little over 3 miles 50 minutes. The workout went well, but I am really achey all over tonight and been getting headaches this week (even before the 1st fast you naysayers lol).

I had planned to do the fast twice a week for awhile but after writing this blog post I think I'm going to do only one day a week (mid week as the weekends are just too hard to stay on track) and to make an effort to eat cleaner and plan more.  I should never be without good choices for food available when I'm hungry.  Eating on the run, is not going to get me to where I want to be.  Which is a size 10 by my birthday in September, that's 5 sizes from where I'm at currently.

Eating clean
Being physically active
Getting plenty of sleep
Eating when I'm hungry (honestly I'm not sure eating several times a day is the best thing anymore).  I'm really torn at the moment about what is going to be best for me.  I understand and until now had agreed that eating frequently throughout the day helped you to avoid eating crappy or overeating, possibly speeding your metabolism.  Now I'm hearing more about how that is just keeping your insulin elevated all day instead of the few spikes from the typical 3 meals which is not necessarily a good thing.  And honestly shouldn't it be better to eat when your body is physically hungry and not just because its been 2 or 3 hours since your last snack.  I'm not a bodybuilder and I don't have the same needs as they do.  And then to answer the call of that hunger with clean healthy foods....  Marie, that doesn't include fat free fudgcicles and pretzels!!!!!

Days 55 & 56 - 24 hour fasting

Day 55
So today I tried a 24 hour fast.  I ate breakfast (well tried to drink a green smoothie and it didn't work too well) so I ended up having oatmeal and almonds around 10am.  Then nothing for the rest of the day except for water until breakfast the next day.  It really wasn't too bad, I didn't feel a real strong physical hunger and when I did I drank some water or found something else to occupy my mind.  Mostly what I experienced was the emotional hunger related to boredom or anxiety.
Didn't exericse as it was recommended not to workout when fasting, besides had an evening home alone with my sweetie so we watched a movie.
This was something I wanted to try as I feel I've been stuck and kind of frustrated.  I don't recommend this for everyone and am not suggesting it to anyone to try - this was something I wanted to try and think I may do again (possibly one day a week).  You eat every day at some point; either B then nothing till next morning or B and L then nothing till next afternoon at L - think I'll try it that way next time so I'm eating in the afternoon and feel up to working out.
Corinne and Joni if you're reading this, don't shoot me please. :)

Day 56
Weight: 226.2 down a pound from the other day (lowest I've gotten on this journey so far - finally down 10 pounds!).  Funny that I dreamed last night I was 226 (it was a strange dream).  Anyways I told myself this morning to dream I'm 225 next lol.  That's the number I've been wanting to see for the past few weeks.
B: scrambled eggs w/ ff cheese and spinach, 1 slice wheat toast and homefries, 1 c. skim milk
S: Yogurt/cherry smoothie
L: Protein Bar, Almonds (had brought a salad but it seemed a little chaotic at the shop today and I didn't eat it - I'll have it tomorrow)
S: Apple, snack pack m&m's
D: Quesadilla with very little cheese and chicken, ff sour cream
S: ff fudgcicle

Didn't work out again tonight :(.  Tomorrow is the Y for boxing and/or walking the track briskly. 

Okay so this doesn't look like me lol, but my gloves do look like these :)

Days 53 & 54 still hanging on literally lol

Day 53 Monday
weight: 227.4 yay starting its way back down.
Food:
B: 2 organic eggs scrambled w/ ff cheese and fresh spinach
S: almonds
L: Fajitas, nacho chips (lunch out)
D: grilled turkey and cheese sandwich
S: Yogurt & cherry smoothie

Activity:
Snowmobiling - okay I probably didn't burn any calories per se as I was just sitting on the back.  But I had to grip my boyfriend with my legs and arms around his middle so tight so I wouldn't fall off the back.  My arms are still sore the next night.  Feels like I did a major amount of pull ups.
This pic is not us but nice pic anyways :)

Day 54:
B: Yogurt/cherry smoothie
S: Protein Bar, grapes
L: Wrap w/ deli turkey breast, lettuce and spinach, 1 serving of FF pretzels
S: FF pudding, apple, almonds 100 cal pack
D: 2 fajitas, 1/2 sweet potatoe, skim milk
S: FF fudgcicle, fruit snacks

Activity:
Walk Away the Pounds tapes, 3 miles then 2 miles.  I didn't want to end my workout after 3 but didn't have the energy to do Tae Bo so I popped in the 2 miles tape. 

I haven't been planning my meals (not a smart move), not counting calories at the moment just trying to eat healthier. Okay okay so the fudgcicle and fruitsnacks were not nutritionally the best choices....

Days 51 & 52 - Getting in the Groove

Day 51
Saturday at the shop, no power at the house so I didn't get my smoothie fixed and felt disoriented in leaving the house.  No exercise today.
Food: this was a really bad day, but I'll suck it up and claim up to it.
B: Cheddar Bagel twist from DD
S: part of an orange, it didn't taste good so maybe only finished 1/3 of it, grapes
L: Protein Bar
D: McD's 3 chicken selects, fries and a mocha frappe.
S: FF fudgcicle
Even though I felt I did so bad foodwise, didn't plan, didn't pack my cooler just threw a protein bar, orange, oodles of noodles (which I didn't have) and some grapes in my bag and ran out the doo (by the time I was leaving work and picking up my son I was feeling ravenous and knew it would be at least an hour before I got home) I felt like I changed my mindset a bit.  It might have been the postings I was reading on Phit-n-Phat or just feeling crappy about my lack of success the last few weeks.  Not sure what it was but I woke up this morning feel much more energized and ready to get serious.

Day 52
B: Kashi Go Lean w/ Skim
Workout: 30 minute WATP video
S: Yogurt/Cherry smoothie
L: homemade chicken soup, shrimp
Workout: Strength Training (detailed below) 30 minutes, Tae Bo Basic 25 minutes (wasn't sure if I was going to be able to finish it, I was panting and sweaty but I just said I'll keep going till I really can't finish and then I had a burst of energy to finish it).
S: Protein Shake and 1 1/2 c. whole wheat pasta w/ tomatoe sauce
D: 4 oz turkey burger w/ spices no bun, green beans (was going to have salad but realized I tend to neglect my green beans so I changed it) and baked sweet potatoe fries
S: FF fudgcicle

I didn't track the calories.  This morning I looked at my old Weight Watchers books and decided I would try the Core Plan (I don't even know if they still do that) but basically it was clean eating foods that you don't have to track, and you get 35 points per week.  I used 4 points today with the protein shake and yogurt and I believe 1 for the fudgcicle.

Since I like alot of the clean eating foods (though almonds are not on the core plan list of foods bummer) I think I could generally follow this plan.  As long as I make sure I have the food available when I am hungry so that I do not stop at McD again, which is not a big problem for me, but still I have weak moments.

Strength training
squats  4x12
DB biceb curls 3x12 w/ 10lb
DB punches 3x12 w/5lb
Bent over Rows 3 x12 w/10lb
Kickbacks 2x12 w/5lb
Bicycle crunches 3x12  x 2
Mountain Climbers 2x24
Clean & Press 2x12 w/8lb
Chest Press on floor 2x12 w/8lb
DB pullover 2x12 w/8lb
Pelvic lifts 3x12  x2
5 Plyo Squat Jumps (those are fun but I started to feel a little light headed lol.

Days 49 & 50 springing forward

oops missed blogging yesterday.
Day 49 - another Day of Rest (I just had too much going on in my head, developing a new class, finishing up another one, marketing upcoming events...)
Food: hmmmm
B: Protein Bar
S: Orange, Oatmeal
L: Salad w/ 2 oz chicken, protein shake
S: almonds 100 calorie pk (I went to shaw's in search of cherries fail!, and um knowing I hadn't eaten enough that afternoon I was struggling not to get something tasty to snack on.  hmmm pringles looked good.  But I opted for the Almond packs and had one while driving home.   I was still struggling though as dinner cooked.  Did I opt for an apple or orange or the red grapes I had just bought? No.... I went for the baked Doritos and finished the f'n bag.  Not buying them again! Not that good anyways :(.
D: homemade chicken soup and 2 slices of wheat bread.
S: I wasn't done, two FF fudgcicles.  Okay I know I'm PMSing but come one.  Can't I control myself????  I'm stuck on the I can handle those 40 calories (twice) but since I didn't end up exercising ... I shouldn't have even had those after the Doritos.

Got some great work done this night though. :) Overall rating for the day I'd give a 7.

Day 50
Food
B: Yogurt cherry smoothie
L: Soup, rice w/ mixed veggies
and alot of talking with Kat at the shop today (just not feeling very hungry)
S: Planned apple, organge and almonds
D: unplanned not sure - this could be dangerous as we are going to the Y after work and probably won't get home till about 8. Not only should I have something to eat to fuel my workout but I'll be starving when I get home and not make good choices.  So, I shall have a glass of milk, and a PB sandwich on the way to the gym and bring a protein shake with me that I'll have after the workout.  Then when I get home maybe some chicken and sweet potatoe fries.

Activity: boxing class and/or walking the track.

Day 48 - DOR

Day 48
Weight: 228.6 yup up down up down wtf????
Food: eh
B: Smoothie w/yogurt and cherries (I'm out of cherries - now what?)
S: baked doritos 1 oz serving
L: Chinese food (not my best but not my worst either - however I did have ice cream for dessert)
D: chicken noodle soup (decided I shall never have Campbells again - mine is so much better and will make that tomorrow night), grilled cheese and turkey sandwich
S: Creamsicle and ah baked doritoes then a FF SF fudgcicle.  Yup I'm PMSing because the junk food especially chocolate has been screaming to me for two days now.  Yesterday I could ignore it.

I believe I need to drink more water (like I was in the beginning) my face looks bloated to me and my skin is not as clear.

I had planned to workout but given how I've felt achey lately I decided to give it a rest for tonight and I'm feeling inspired to do some work related stuff and develop a program to launch in the spring to help motivate others to lose weight and get healthy.

 at least I'm blogging even if I'm not proud of how my day went.   When I eat out, it all goes down the tubes.  It shouldn't and doesn't necessarily have to work that way - but for now that is the pattern. So "Just say NO" to eating out!  I'm uhhh talking to myself here, not you dear reader :)

Day 47 - trudging along

Day 47
Trudging along.  I should have stayed in ignorant bliss but no, I had to go check the nutrition facts from the Olive Garden.  Just so you know, the fettucini Alfredo is one of the worst things you could order 1220 calories and I don't think that included the chicken (I'm hoping that is the dinner size portion) I had the lunch size and had the 2nd half of that today.  Next time I'll go with something lighter or just not go lol.

Food for today:
B: Lemon yogurt & cherry smoothie, cinnamon oatmeal
S: String cheese
L: 1 c. fettucini alfredo w/ chicken, salad w/ a 1 oz of chicken (didn't make the green beans I had planned)
S: Orange, protein bar
D: 4 oz turkey burger, steamed rice w/ mixed veggies, small baked potatoe w/ Fage, skim milk
S: Apple, protein shake, FF fudgcicle (last minute snack not planned for)

I have been wanting junk food all day, but didn't give in.

Activity for today:
30 minute WATP video, 20 pushups, a couple of 10 second planks and just a bit of weight work.  I just wasn't into it tonight.

I think I might be coming down with something, my workouts have been really tough on me lately.  I thought they were supposed to get easier not more difficult, the more you did them :)))

 

Days 44-46 let's get accountable :)

Days 44 - 46.  I am promising to make the effort to blog every night whether or not I have anything positive to report.  It helps keep me accountable and on track.

Day 44 - Saturday I did alright with my food intake (though I wasn't tracking it), didn't work out.
Day 45 - Sunday eh did okay on food again but still did not track it.  However, I did workout.  Tae Bo and Walking and I was one hot sweaty mess when I was done, burned 680 something calories whoo hooo.

Today Day 46 - Valentines Day - We went to Olive Garden for lunch and I had 2 too many breadsticks which means I had 3 lol.  AND I asked for alfredo sauce (what was I thinking?).  I finally remembered to ask for dressing on the side though for the salad, its usually too saturated with dressing when they bring it out to the table.  I have half of my lunch left for tomorrow's lunch - yummy.  Will have to be extra good the rest of the day as it is chicken alfredo :).  For my workout I did a 3 mile WATP video (newer video version to change it up a bit) burned 484 calories.  I haven't taken measurements in a while and I should.   Even though I've continued to workout 3-4 times a week (even though I haven't blogged about it as much), my last few workouts have been killer on my body.  I hope I'm not getting sick, sneezing a bit today yuck! This weather sucks.

I'm feeling inspired to get back on track 100%.  I can tell when I'm not giving it 100% -the results show (or rather don't show) on the scale.

So tomorrow is a new day, a new day #1, a fresh start, a clean slate and yeah all that jazz! let's do it!!!!

Day 43 - working out at the Y

Day 43
weight: didn't check it 'fraid to lol.

Food did okay except for a small binge on bacon (that shit should be outlawed)
B: Toast w/ margarine, yogurt/cherry smoothie
S: Apple/cinnamon Oatmeal
L: PB sandwich on WW (didn't eat my salad :( ), orange
S: Grapes, protein bar
D: Chicken bacon wrap sandwich, sweet potatoe fries, 2 servings of bacon.  At least the package is gone now lol.
S: sm Mocha Frappe from McD

Okay not sure what happened with the bacon binge lol, but I should have eaten the salad, the almonds, apple and raisins that I had with me today and I might not have been that hungry when I started cooking.

We went to the gym today and I walked the track at a fairly fast pace, then decided to be brave and join the boxing class that my BF and son were doing.  It was fun, after only 15 minutes I was sweating and panting lol, so a good workout even though it was quick.  The plan is to get there earlier next Friday and do the whole hour class.  I was the only female there so it was just a tad uncomfortable but not too bad, then some more walking.  All in all about an hour workout.

I need to stay on plan with my food and workouts this weekend.  Okay let me rephrase that a couple times. I want to stay on plan with my food and workouts this weekend (better).  I am on plan this weekend with my food and workouts (better still) :))

Day 41 - moving onto Advanced Tae Bo

Day 41
Weight: didnt check it
Food: a bit low on calories I think (unless the gluten free chocolate frosted pb rice crispy bar was way over 300 cals) :)
B: Kashi Go Lean w/ skim and a protein shake
S: Orange, pretzels
L: Sandwich on WW with turkey, cheese and Romaine lettuce, mixed veggies, string cheese
S: Rice Crispy bar
D: Chicken Caesar Salad w/ maybe 2 tsp dressing and a dinner roll w/ butter
S: Protein Shake, PB on gluten free whole grain bread, creamsicle

Activity:
Early morning cardio - 2 mile WATP 30 minutes
Evening cardio = Advanced Tae Bo 60 minutes    This was a killer workout, it felt good despite listening to all the swearing.... coming from me lol.  Wow! my legs and shoulders were burning!!!!!

Hoping to get up in the morning to do another WATP video before I start my day, it definately helps to give me energy.  Also going to try my sample 24K energy supplement from Reliv.  Contact me if you want some info on this and I'll try to post tomorrow on how I do for the day with it. :)

Day 39 - love my punching bag and pink gloves

Day 39
didn't check weight today but yesterday it was at 228.2.  Getting lower but very very slowly as the scale has been climbing up and down for the last 2 weeks or so.  However, so has my focus.

Food: at about 1,773 calories at 9:36pm and needing 2,280. hmmmmmm
B: yogurt/cherry smoothie (needed more but was distracted at work till about noon)
S: apple
L: turkey, cheese, lettuce sandwich on whole wheat, Sobe Life water, FF pudding
S: Almonds, 2 packages of 100cal choc. covered pretzels (those packs are really not very satisfying so glad that was the last of them
D: Brown rice, teriyaki chicken, a bit of white rice/w veggies (steam bag), skim milk, creamsicle, AND FF fudgcicle
S: yogurt/cherry smoothie (tried a new yogurt, more calories but didn't taste that good :( )
Plan to have a bowl of cereal before bed.

Activity:
I worked out after dinner as I probably wouldn't have had the energy otherwise.
30 minutes Biggest Loser Body Sculpt workout (included 5 min. warm up and 5 min cool down), 44 minutes 3 mile Walk Away the Pounds, 7.5 minutes punching the heavy bag - very cleansing.
30 wall pushup and 4 were done during the BL workout.
Did better with my water today, yay but not as much as I need.

I feel that I'm slowly getting my focus back.  It was that whole balance thing that I knew was going to be my nemesis during this journey.  Its what sabotaged me last time and caused a relapse and many pounds gained back (about 50 to be exact).  I really want to be able to master this.  It is our mantra at my shop, "Creating balance for mind, body and spirit".

When you've lived your life battling a weight problem, you have to be vigilant.  Its work (which I don't mind) and it requires some focus (which I don't mind).  I'm a work in progress physically and mentally :)))

Transformation is my theme for this year, Balance is the key to my success.

Day 36 - might as well be on a starvation diet :(

Day 36
Not planning my meals lately = no success
Food today:
B: Bagel thin w/ PB
Oatmeal later at shop
L: 1/2 caesar salad (forgot to ask for the dressing on the side ughhhh yuck I dislike soggy salad), sweet potatoe fries 1/2 order eaten (they deep fried them ick)
S: Protein shake after workout (didn't really need it, I try to only have them when I strength train but I was hungry)
D: turkey burger on a bun with lettuce, LF cheese, tomatoe (yay me) and a bun.
S: Yogurt and cherry smoothie, couple of peanuts.
feels like i must have eaten something else..... but I don't think I did.
Maybe 20 oz of water if I'm lucky
WTF????????  no wonder the scale is going up a bit this week.  I'm not eating enough so my body is going to be holding onto it all.
Didn't help that I had dinner out the other night and everything was fried :(
Activity today:
WATP 4 fast miles 47 minutes.  That was a nice change :)

Time to get back on track!

Day 34 - Hanging in there

Day 34
I started my workout today around 12:30 and started with the Jari Love CD, I just didn't have the energy to finish it.  Then I put in the WATP 3 mile tape and thought that might be easier and honestly it wasn't. I made it about 3/4 of a mile and realized I didn't have any energy and hadn't eaten much yet.  About 9am I had a cup of Kashi Go Lean cereal with skim milk and nothing else.  So i took a break and had a PB sandwich on wheat, with an apple and blueberry green tea, then grabbed some almonds and went back down to try and finish.

Yay, I put in the Tae Bo Basic workout and did that for 25 min, then put in the 3 mile WATP and finshed that one for a total of 3 miles, 44 minutes.  It does help to consume the calories, in order to fuel your workouts.  I should know that and I do know that.

I did take my measurements and wasn't super excited about them.  I did lose a few inches.  It is difficult to know if you are measuring in the same spot as the last time (obviously my plan to wear particular clothes so that I would know where to put the tape didnt' work out).  I'm considering using a permanent marker on my skin (but is that wise?), there must be an easier way.  Maybe having someone else do the measurements for me, but how embarrassing.  No matter how hard you try not to suck in your gut, so that you get a good measurement, you will, especially if someone else is taking the measurement.  Heck, I do it when I'm measuring myself lol.

I think I'm beginning to feel impatient with this weight loss, even though its half that I want to be healthier and half to lose the weight.  I know I'm getting healthier but I want to see the results already of weight loss.  So, I stop and think to myself, am I putting 100% into this? No I haven't for the last 2 weeks.  I'm putting in maybe 70% so I'll get even less a percentage of results. 

Ugh I have to remember that if I lose my motivation and fall back into bad habits (it would be so easy) I'll quickly move the other way and I care too much about myself and my future to let that happen.  I want to be around to watch my grandchild(ren) grow up, I want to be around when my son is old enough to get married and have his own children.  I have too much to give and too much to take, too much to experience and too much to teach to not make this lifestyle change a permanent thing and see it through to the end, despite the hard workouts, and despite the not so great food days.

Every day is a new chance to give it 100%, every meal is a chance to give it 100%.

Day 31 - More Love (Jari Love that is)

Day 31
Weight (done yesterday 228.6) okay can we keep it moving down now? geeesh

Food: to be honest I haven't been counting calories for a few days (Not sure where my head has been).  I have not yet gotten into a good enough routine where I can eyeball it and know the calories.  Even if I had, I haven't been trying to count them as I go the last few days. 
Good news is I haven't pigged out or made terrible choices (though not always great).

Activity: None on day 29 or 30.  Today: Jari Love's Slim and Lean DVD (wow that was a tough one lol) and then 3 miles WATP.  Felt really good after and planning to work out again tomorrow.

Measurements are also up for tomorrow night :)))) I'm crossing my fingers.

This is just the first set back (this week), and I'm sure there are more to come along this journey.  As long as I hang tough and get right back on track I'm good.  Loving these cherry, vanilla yogurt smoothies. Tonight I put in some V8Fusion w/ Acai berry.  Its not quite as good as without it, but good enough for me and a little extra goodness.

I NEED to plan my food and my workouts and then stick to my plan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Day - what day is this??? I think 28 :)

Day 28

I feel that I have been in "maintenance mode" and not "losing it" mode for most of the week.  Thanks to my period and possibly the 3rd week cool down on motivation I've had little energy to work out.  While my food has been okay, it hasn't been great.  I've had a day of carb binging (it really wasn't as bad as it felt like it was in the moment), and numerous physical cravings for a diet coke, chips, ice cream and candybars.  None of which I succumbed to thankfully.  They weren't strong enough cravings to make me want to give up the new habits I'm trying to build upon.

So a dear friend did a reading on me and said that the spirit guides are saying I need to eat Cherries, and tomatoes, and more red /orange veggies and fruits.  I'm down with green, doing good on that but I need to add in more colorful foods.  I knew that of course, just been slow at doing it. 

After the last time I got the message (from her and the guides as a matter of fact) to eat cherries, I bought some.  Not knowing anything about natural cherries, I bought Bing cherries.  Wow super sour.   So this time I bought some, not sure if they are sweet cherries or what but they aren't too bad and I've mixed them with FF vanilla yogurt and some ice cubes and made a delicious cherry smoothy.  One last night and one this morning.  Okay spirit, I'm getting in my cherries finally.  Also put tomatoes on my sandwich today and did actually eat it.  Okay I know, sad that this seems monumental to me, but it is.  I've never liked tomatoes.  Always loved tomatoe soup, juice, sauce.  But never the raw tomatoes and I'm hearing its the enzymes in the raw food that my body wants/needs right now.  So I'm obliging the best I can and of course there is room for improvement.

I forgot to do my measurements Monday so I'll wait and do them on the next Monday.  I did step on the scale today and it was 229.  Okay I'll take that (like I had a choice right?) but really want to see 225 soon. My clothes are starting to fit better yay.

Action plan for tonight: eat a healthy dinner small portion of wheat pasta w/ shrimp, tomatoe slices on toasted french bread with LF provolone or mozzarella broiled on top, salad and a workout.  A full body strength training, think I'll dig out my Jari Love DVD (will have to do it upstairs but that's okay) and then maybe the Tae Bo Cardio again.  I think my sides have recovered from the last time.  Oh and I'm behind on my pushup challenge because of my low energy the last couple of days.  So I'll be doing some of them too.  :))

Never giving up!!!!

Day 25 - pushing through the discomfort

Day 25
Weight: didn't check (I'm trying to wait a week... so I'll post it in a day or two lol)
Food: total cals about 2,200 (If I have 2 pieces of pb toast and some skim milk before I go to bed) I never thought I'd have an issue trying to get in enough calories!  Though I do remember when I was on Weight Watchers a few years ago, I had trouble getting in all my points and found myself at Wendy's a couple times getting a 7 point Frosty.  Weird thinking (having a 7 pt frosty instead of 7 pts of healthy food) but still... it worked.  I lost weight.
Activity: Okay first let me say OWWWW I'm feeling the after affects of my workout yesterday.  My triceps and chest muscles are whining at me tonight and now my calves are aching too.  But its a good kind of sore.  Not like a sore muscle from an injury, that's different.
Today:
60 pushups -not the 80 I had planned on.  Oh heck, I'll do the other 20 before I hit the sack.  The challenge this week is 400 and see many of the girls on Phit-N-Phat are planning to do 80 per day for 5 days (most 40 in the morning and 40 in the evening).  So that sounds like a good plan of action and I'll work on the same.
Walk Away the Pounds 3 miles no DBs used today.
Machine work: 3 sets of 10 leg extensions w/ 30lbs, 3 sets of leg curls w/ 20lbs. I tried using the cable to swing my leg out but it just wasn't going to happen tonight.

Overall a good day and my honey is looking for a new heart rate monitor for me. Yay!

Here is the link to a video on getting and staying motivated for the long haul of a journey like this.

Days 23 & 24th -

Day 23
Weight: 229.7
Food: came in a bit low on calories estimated at about 1,550
Activity: not much time but did 40 pushups and 40 squats

Day 24:
Weight: 228.6 (yay back on the way down, as it should be)
Food:
B. Oatmeal and tomato juice
S: Fiber One Bar
L: Turkey Wrap sandwich and crackers
S: Protein shake (after workout)
D: Tortilla chips w/ taco ground turkey, sauce and Fage (greek yogurt - tastes just like Sour Cream) yum and sweet potato fries
S: Skim milk
Total: 2,240
Activity:
ST (arms)  (improvement made: increase reps to 12 from 10)
Bicep Curls 3 sets of 12 w/ 8LB
DB Punches 3 sets of 12 w/ 5LB
Tricep Kickbacks 3 sets of 12 w/ 8LB
Chest Press on Bench " "
DB Pullover " "
Bent Over Row "  "
Flys  3 sets of 12 w/ 5LB
Pushups on wall 50 on knees 10.   Need another 50 to meet the PNP challenge for this week.  I came into the challenge starting with week 3 of 300 pushups (any style - against the wall counts thank God) Okay taking a break here.... I'm too close to finishing this challenge and I'm going to do it.  Now drop and give me 50!!!! :)))) Booyaaaa

I did it I did it!!! 15 more on knees the first 10 were a breeze and the final 35 against the wall. Yeah Baby!

Day 22 - near perfect day

Day 22
Weight: 231 I'm giving it the silent treatment now :) Although I think the recent gain over the past two days is water/PMS related.  We'll see how this next week goes.

Day started off a little hectic - got a call while I was still in bed from my BF who slid off the road into a snowbank, some shoveling and fancy driving later he was out within 40 minutes.

Food: I made it to 2280 approx calories yay!  Made a yummy caesar chicken wrap sandwich for lunch, turkery burger, rice pilaf and green beans for dinner.  Various snacks but the same I've had all week.  I'm out of my pink lady apples, so a trip to the store is in order for tomorrow for those and some different things for fruits and snacks.  I vowed to do my weekly dinner meal planning on Sunday night, but I guess i'll have to maybe do it tomorrow during the day so I can pick up the ingredients when I'm at the store.

Activity: I decided to do an early cardio this afternoon.  Put in the 3 mile WATP video and pulled some other videos out (a step workout and kickboxing with Denise Austin) sooooooo I ended up skipping the WATP cool down and putting in the 2 mile WATP video (so 5 miles total).  As I was walking the first one I felt kind of achey (made a note to myself to start stretching more at night and after strength workouts) so I didn't feel up to the step video and frankly Denise Austin (though I think she's great) I can't take her voice for too long.  I'm more of a Jillian Michaels personality fan :)  I'm glad I did the workout early because the night got away from me and even though I had planned to do another workout I feel good that I did two tapes earlier.  Which just goes to prove the value of Corinne's advice to workout on the days or at the time you can, because we have things that will pop up during regularly scheduled sessions.

So I think a new heart rate monitor is in order.  At one point during my workout, I tested my heart rate and it said like 202 beats per minute and didn't even give me a % as that would have been off the chart.  Ummmm I wasn't breathing that hard so I know it wasn't accurate.  Its quite old and I had to replace the battery the other night.  Said I burned over a 1000 calories ??? hmm possible but I don't think it was quite that high despite it being an hour and 13 minutes, its pretty low impact.  Really doesn't matter, the important thing is that I was active.  And, I stretched tonight before I started this blog.

Dinner out is planned for tomorrow night, hopefully my friend picks a place that serves a good salad because that is what I'm craving.  Think I'll avoid the red meat ugh.  I believe its psychological but I still feel like that sirloin from the other night is sitting right in the pit of my stomach yuck!!!

Tomorrow:  Push ups, lunges, squats at the shop and whatever else I can do there just in case I don't feel up to working out when I get home. :)

Have a beautiful and joyful weekend!    

Day 21 - Pushed through the tiredness and feeling great

Day 21
Weight: 230.0 grrrrrr (that's all I have to say about that)
Activity: Made definate improvements to my strength workout and looking forward to moving up more
Squats w/ 8lb DB 3 sets of 10
Wall Pushups 40
Lunges (no weight, having trouble staying balanced doing these lol) 3 sets of 10
Bicep Curls w/ 8lb DB 3 sets of 10
OH Press w/ 8lb DB 3 sets of 10
Flys front w/ 5lb DB 3 sets of 10
Flys rear w/ 5lb DB 3 sets of 10
Tricep Kickbacks w/ 5lb DB 1 set of 10, w/ 8lb DB 2 sets of 10
Calf Raises 1 set of 10 w/ 5lb (hanging off stair) 2 sets of 10 w/ 8lb DB standing, Single calf raises 3 sets of 5
Leg lifts - outer and inner thighs each 4 sets of 10 for 80 total
Crunches 2 sets of 10, reverse crunches 2 sets of 10
Planks (um 6 seconds on first and 10 seconds on second) sad :( but those suckers are harder than they look.
Then 25 minute Tae Bo Basic.
Total calories burned according to heart rate monitor 728!! whoo hoo
Food:
I did it 2280 approx calories !!!! finishing a peanut butter sandwich right now to get them all in!

this was after the strength training workout and this........

is after the 25 minute cardio and cool down.  Couldn't quite make a full smile - I love me some Billy Blanks Tae Bo!!!!  this is what we call a "hot sweaty mess" on Phit-n-Phat.
Off to take a nice warm bath as my self nurting act for today :)

Day 20 - blahhh lol

Day 20
Weight: didn't bother
Food/Calories:: ended up with about 1600 for the day (not feeling well tonight)
Activity: None besides 10 desk pushups (about all I could muster for energy)

I did well through the day and then after dinner, I lost all my energy and felt sick to my stomach.  Could it have been because I had pasta for dinner (I had planned a turkey burger, but Tim asked for two and if it keeps him from eating pizza at his meeting - which is bad for him- I'll have something else-so I did).  I also figured that since I had eaten chicken at lunch and snacked on turkey I was okay not to go with any more protein.  Maybe it was the skim milk I had with dinner and then the cup of tomato juice I had right after that my son didn't want to finish, so I did.  Did the mixture of the two turn my stomach.  Listening to my body now... it says yes -yuck. okay lesson learned.

I'll be learning to eat more intuitively now and hoping that helps.  My book Eating In the Light of the Moon should be in soon, thanks Katerina for letting me know about this book.  We are working on getting a discussion group together to work through this book together. :)

I didn't finish up the snacks I had planned, nor got in near enough veggies today or water :(

I've been learning more about the Master Cleanse and truly believe I want to try this.  I feel so bloated tonight and I haven't had anything since about 6:30 and its now 4 hours later.

I am committing to my progressing goals (at Corinne's request) to meal plan dinners for the week on Sunday, to plan daytime meals and snacks the night prior. To put my workouts in my planner weekly, and if I have to skip one (like tonight) I'll reschedule it for the next day, even if one is already scheduled then - so will do two.  To review my ST workout notes and find a way to improve each time, i.e. increase weight, reps, sets, new exercise to incorporate.

"Just Do It!" Nike

Day 19 - Feeling Strong

Day 19
Weight: 228.8 (down 2)

Activity: Wall push ups 100 (my challenge is 300 this week and to work in knee or toe push ups in it)
Strength Training  using 5lb DB and doing 3 or more sets of 10 or 15 reps of Bicep Curls, Overhead Shoulder Press, Tricep Kickbacks, DB punches (forgot to log that on phit-n-phat)
Without weights crunches 50, lunges 3 sets of 10, calf raises 3 sets of 30, squats 3 sets of 10. I was able to do these at the shop this morning :) Being the weight I am - doing these exercises working against my bodyweight is effective.  With extra weights it is better but if I can accomplish them at work and save myself time at night that's okay with me.  You may just end up seeing dumbbells at Soul Sanctuary someday lol.
Cardio: WATP 3 miles using 5lb DB for 45 minutes.

Food:
B: apple, oatmeal (not so crazy about the gluten free brand I bought last night - maybe the instant has alot of sugar and that is why I came to like that)
S: Mozzarella stick, pretzel sticks
L: 4 oz turkey breast, cup of steamed veggies (OMG if you knew me 10 years ago then you know hell froze over in my world), FF pudding
S: Almonds, apple, protein shake, 1 oz dark chocolate
D: ((planned at 2pm))Sirloin dinner at Ruby Tuesday (651 cals) since I've started my workout already and plan to do more tonight after dinner I need to get in 2,300 calories.  Even with one of the highest calorie filled fit & trim selections I'm 700 calories shy of my target.  Hmm I may opt for one of the other items on the menu but they don't list those calorie counts (only the ones for the fit & trim selections) now what???  Do I chance it and go for something else knowing that I could possibly go over on my calories but also may come out just about right?  Restaurants really need to list the nutrition facts for all their food selections.  I also am not crazy about having steak as it sits in your intestines for so long yuck.  I really feel ill when I think about how long it takes for us to expend red meat.  I may go for a fish dish, as I'm trying to steer clear of chicken, I get that enough at home now :).

Okay its 10:59pm and I ended up with the petite sirloin with only 561 calories (minus whatever half the potatoes would be, not crazy about them), salad and one carrot cupcake (estimating that at 350 calories) its hard to track when you eat out!
So with my added snacks of an apple, protein shake, dark chocolate and dessert I'm at approx 2,286 calories.  That's close enough for me. :) Honestly I'm eating more now and losing weight then I was 2 months ago. I simply changed most of the foods I eat and now I'm exercising too. 

I am just going to have to accept 236.2 as my starting weight and leave it at that (even if its not completely accurate - darn dial scale).  I keep messing up what I think my total loss is because I had 239 stuck in my head from the first day and for some reason thinking 237.2 lately and thinking I had lost 9 with only 3 left to go.  Its messing with me lol.   So I declare - I started this leg of my journey at 236.2 and today I am 228.8 for a 7.4 pound loss (Yay by the way) that means I have 4.6 left to lose before the 31st (that was my original goal for January).  Since I lost about a week due to increasing my calories and may stall again according to Corinne at Phit-n-Phat I will accept what my body gives me for results and set my new goal on February 1st for the month.  Its all good and I'm feeling great and feeling strong.



Tomorrow: 2,280 calorie goal, Cardio (Tae Bo since i didn't get it in tonight), Pushups for my challenge, and more water, thursday upping the DB weights to 8lbs.

Day 18 - Measurement Success

Day 18
Another day down :)
Weight: 230.8 (down 1.6 from last I checked two days ago)
Activity: None today
Measurements: I won't list my measurements lol I'm not that self brutal but notable changes are:

Rt upper arm: up .4"
Lt upper arm: up .7"  (okay I want these to go down lol, so from now on I will wear the same tshirt each time I measure so that I can be sure the tape is in the same spot each week -at the bottom of the arm cuff- maybe its from starting my free weights work or the tape was placed in a different place)
Waist: down 1"
Neck: down .2"
Rt thigh: down .2"
Lt thigh: same   (again will wear the same shorts that hit midthigh to be sure I get the same spot each week)
Rt calf: down .4"
Lt calf: down .2"
Hips: down .5"
Abs: down 2.6"

We had a great conversation at a meeting tonight about the Master Cleanse, so I'm thinking even more that I would like to try this very soon.   Stopped at the store on the way home and picked up Gluten Free oatmeal, some Quinoa and Gluten Free gingersnaps (not a clean food lol, but a nice gluten free snack).

I've found myself having oatmeal every day now and liking it for the most part, it does kind of stick to your ribs huh? :)

Just shy of my 1,800 calories at about 1,710 and feeling good.  Lots of water today, but not the gallon I had planned.  So I will go for it again tomorrow and I find it easy to do when I'm at work all day.  Dinner is planned at Ruby Tuesday tomorrow and I'm looking forward to the fresh salad bar.

For some reason I had a craving for a diet coke today and junk food.  I tapped into why I think I may have been having those cravings, an emotional reaction to a past trauma, but I refrained and work through the craving - yay me! Overeating or eating unhealthy is no longer the way I will deal with emotional upheaval in my life!

Weight and Cardio tomorrow.  I've had 2 Days of Rest out of the last 3 days, so back to work.  I'm not sure how much weight I want to lose overall yet, at least another 80, maybe 100, but thinking I'd like to be in a size 8.  I don't think I ever fit into a size 8, not even as a child.  I do have a pair of size 18 jeans that were too snug when I bought them a couple months ago (even though other brands in that size still fit) so I think I'll try them on tomorrow morning.

Day 17 - Strength training and gluten free diet?

Day 17:
I didn't weigh in today but who knows I may do a midnight weigh in again lol (what a nut!).  However, I will be taking measurements again tomorrow :) and hopefully will see some changes for the better.
Food: Fail! I didn't plan the night before and that was a mistake as I did plan to work out and was supposed to take in 2,300 calories which I know I haven't and didn't get in any fruits.  Also have not gotten in all of my water.  I'm not sure what happened today food/water wise but it is what it is and I won't beat myself up over it.  Move on to tomorrow.
Activity:
Tried my first day circuit workout from Phit-N-Phat's New Year New You plan and wow!  I would normally try to do 3 rounds of the exercises and I made it one and barely one half before I was exhausted.  I had to put the turkey in the oven by then and I gladly took that excuse besides a trip to the restroom to get my wind back.
Stability Ball Crunches 2 rounds of 20
Stationery Lunges w/ 5lb DB 2 rounds of 10 each leg
Standing Leg Lifts 2 rounds of 20 each leg
Glute Bridges 1 round of 20 (these are relatively easy so I should have continued to do another round of these)
Resistance Band Standing Walk 1 round of 2x20 steps
30 seconds of Mountain Climbers (not too bad)
1 minute Lateral Duck Under (left me winded with plyo jumps)
30 seconds Running Toe Taps (did it!)
1 minute Step Ups (did it, but I think my step was too high)
Took a break, started turkey for dinner, lots of interaction and interruptions from son and his friend who is over for the night.
Back down to the basement to do some more :)
Bicep Curls w/ 5lbs 2 sets of 20
Tricep kickbacks w/ 3lbs 1 set of 10 each arm, Tricep drops behind head w/ 3 lbs 1 set of 10 ea arm
Inclined Flys w/ 3 lbs 1 set of 20, w/ 5lbs 1 set of 20
Rows w/ 5 lbs 2 sets of 20 ea arm
Overhead Shoulder Press w/ 3lbs 2 sets of 20 (both arms)
Squats w/ 5lbs each hand 1 set of 10, w/ 5lbs feet wide 1 set of 10
Calf Raises w/ 5lbs each hand 2 sets of 10x3

Lunch :)
Back down for a 45 minute cardio - Walk Away the Pounds w/ 3lb dumbells

I saw a picture of the fire ceremony in which the prayer bundles were burned and released to spirit for handling and felt there go my excess pounds I asked to have release from I felt lighter already :)

I'm glad I worked out but felt like I only brought 70% to the workouts.  I actually felt tired, which is not unusual to feel that way the day after these ceremonies, but its okay I loved it and I'm feeling strong tonight.
My goal for tonight plan plan plan!
Oh and I think hell may have frozen over, I cut up sweet potatoes, baby yukons, carrots and celery and roasted them in the oven for dinner and actually ate some.  Oh and I now like the oatmeal (that didn't take long but I think I'll still try the Bob's Red Mill brand that is gluten free.)

I'm thinking I should try a gluten free diet for a few weeks and see if there are any differences in my body.  One lady I met yesterday said that she had all sorts of things with her body clear up and lost 6 inches from her waist (I don't believe she made any other changes then to cut out Gluten).  So many of us are allergic to it to some degree so I'm curious if I am.  If so, its probably mild but could make some definate changes for my health and wellbeing.

Tomorrow: cardio only to include my Tae Bo, measurements, water and 2,300 calories (I can do it) and it seems so ungodly ridiculous that I'm having a hard time getting in all my calories and I've been overweight for almost every year of my life except maybe between the ages of birth and 4 and that year when I was 39 lol.

Releasing

Day 16 - we had a Ceremony of Light and Andean Despacho event at the shop tonight and I prepared and offered three prayers.  The first two I will keep to myself but I will talk about the 3rd.

I said a prayer for myself, for ease in this transition.  I asked for a release.  A release of all these excess pounds that have served me for years, they served their purpose and now they can go thank you.  Releasing all the pounds relating to stress, pounds from hurt, pounds of anger and rage, pounds of fear, pounds of sadness and guilt, pounds of exhaustion, pounds of responsibility, pounds of yesterday and past lifes.  Let it all go - I don't need to hold them any longer.  Releasing all of these excess pounds will make me stronger and allow me to be a better channel for the healing work I am to do.

Release release release. I surrender. 

I honor the pounds, for they came with much struggle. I love them for they served to keep in the background when I wanted to be.  I love my body and its time to shed the heavy coat that's held it down from flying and shining.

Rock on!

Days 15 & 16 - On track and first challenge

Day 15 - didn't weigh in and decided to hold off for a week before checking in since I'm upping my calories so much (I didn't want to get discouraged)
Did pretty good food wise about 2100 calories (slightly less than what I'm supposed to have on an active day)
Food:
Pre workout dry bagel flat and skim milk early morning (that is tough for me to get up early to do anything - so kudos to me)
Post workout - oatmeal (only 2nd time in life I've tried oatmeal and I don't really care for it, but I will learn to like it like I did raw spinach :) )
Snack: Orange, mozzarella stick
Lunch: Turkey and cheese sandwich on whole wheat w/ lettuce, pretzel sticks, FF pudding
Snack: Apple
Dinner: Turkey burger with cheese on whole wheat bun, big green salad
Evening snacks: Garden Herb triscuits (OMG you only get 6 for 120 calories) w/ laughing cow cheese, FF fudgcicle, Cereal w/ Skim milk.  I was actually struggling to get the calories I did.

Activity: WATP 2 mile walk 30 minutes using the resistance band till it broke (it was really old) so back to 2lb dumbbell next time.

I accepted a challenge to drink one gallon of water per day this weekend. Doing good so far and only been to the restroom 4 times since 8 am lol its about noon now. giggle.

Day 16
At the shop all day for a class and then an event so I packed my cooler today.
Foods when I can get them today (shooting for 1800 as there will be no exercising today)
2 egg whites and 1 yolk, tomato juice, 1 c. OJ, oatmeal, sandwich, lean cuisine ravioli, steamed veggies, 1 oz dark chocolate, apple, mozzarella stick, yogurt and granola, almonds and 1 gallon of water.

Tomorrow: I start my strength training wooo hoooo :)
Oh and I couldn't help it I stepped on the scale in the middle of the night and I had gone back to 236.4. sigh  okay okay.  Then checked again later this morning post shower and it was back to 232.4 Not bad about where I was at the beginning of the week.  My body will take time to adjust to the increase in calories and then I'll be hitting the exercising hard starting tomorrow and hope to start seeing some real results soon :)

Day 14 (for real) - How do I achieve what I want?

Day 14 (for real - yesterday was actually Day 13)
Weight: not weighing for a week, just in case I get discouraged with increasing the calories
Activity: shoveling snow for 1 hour - approx calories burned 400 :)
Food today:
Breakfast: Bagel thin w/ PB and skim milk
Lunch: Tomato Soup and Aborio Rice, 6 oz chicken breast.  You know, when you weigh the foods, its not nearly as much as you think.  Restuarant portions are gigantic - no wonder we have weight problems.
Dinner: Baked Haddock and Tilapia (decided I don't really care for Tilapia 2nd time I've tried it and probably the last), roasted baby yukon gold potatoes with garlic and onion powder and a tsp of olive oil, green beans
Snacks: clementine, pretzel sticks, apple, almonds, FF SF fudcicle
I'm only at about 1550 calories.  Not quite the 1800 for non active days and I count my snow shoveling as a workout as that is not a typical activity, so technically I should have had another 770 calories or so.  I decided to not do another workout tonight and maybe that will help balance it .  However, I'm planning to get up early tomorrow and do one before I take my son to school (I'm so not a morning person so we'll see).

I learned a valuable lesson tonight - I need to preplan my meals for the day (I really need to do it for the week so I can prep as much as I can and always have the items on hand that I need) so that I can work in the proper amount of calories.  Then I just have to follow through and eat.  But trying to work it in through the day... doesn't work.  I should have had another small meal between breakfast and lunch after my workout, and then another between lunch and dinner instead of a few small snacks (I was starving and dinner wasn't until about 7 tonight).

~Mindset~

Know what the difference is between me and some other people who feel they don't get what they want? Mindset!  When I set my mind on something I want, I believe I deserve it, I know why I want it, I have passion about it, I take action to get it.  I've had people say to me in the past: you are a force, you are so driven, you always seem to get what you want, you always get your way.  Sometimes it is said with a negative attachment (at least that is how it feels at times depending on the situation that caused the remark).  But honestly, I do deserve to have and achieve what I want.  If its not hurting anyone else and is for my highest good, then there's no stopping me.   The same can be true for you too. 

I don't know how I got the belief that what I want I get (I wasn't especially spoiled as a child nor as an adult) but I have it and I do truly believe I can accomplish anything I set my mind to.  And once I believe it, I'm excited and passionate about it, I'm eager to start it right away (I don't hem and haw and worry about all the details, is it right, how should I go about...) all that takes too long.  I jump right in and get going.  That's the Law of Attraction in motion - when you actively take steps "as if" you already have what you desire, you believe it and you are excited about it - it can't help but to manifest in your reality.

How did I get the mindset to change my lifestyle? I don't know - it doesn't come with days of analyzing, doctor's orders, poring over unattractive photos (though it helps), discussing it with friends, making a plan, getting info to make the plan work.  NOPE, I just wake up and say I'm done.  I'm done with looking and feeling like I do and I know what to do to change it, so let's go.  Immediately, my body wants to move, immediately I'm looking for healthier choices in foods.  Somehow I inspire myself and then I surround myself with other people who inspire me, whether that is other people to spend more time with, reading books that will help me to achieve the lifestyle I want, joining sites of people that inspire me and are doing or being what I want to do or be.

So,

1. Be clear about what you want

2. Know why you want it

3. Believe you deserve it

4. Believe you can have it

5. Take action "as if" start living it today

6. Surround yourself with inspiring people (online and offline) be inspiring for yourself!



Day 14- Back in the Groove and almost doubling my calories tomorrow wth????

Day 14
Weight: 231.6 (down .8) yay - good - finally
Fat % didn't check it and think I'll use the other site weekly to check it.

Snow day at home, it was so nice.
Activity today: Got on the Treadmill for 30 minutes at a pretty brisk pace, then started a Pilates tape but didn't get very far, ended up doing about 50 crunches.  I was feeling kind of blah because I just wasn't having the same results as I used to and got to thinking (FGT again er that stands for Fat Girl Thinking) that okay I'm 3-4 years older and I had gained 50 back in the past two years (that I had worked so diligently to lose back then) and that maybe my body just wasn't going to respond the same way or that it might get harder and I'll have to work my way there.  Actually felt kind of depressed about that. Then tonight after dinner my sweetie came up and said he fixed my tv/vcr in my workout area. So I went down and yes its working yay! I popped in the 3 mile Walk Away the Pounds video and used my 2 pound weights instead of the belt.  I was sweating a little at the end 45 minutes later- it was a good workout.  During the cool down I said to BF, huh this used to be my warmup!!  Then I thought well I do feel energized why not try something else, so I popped in my Tae Bo Basic which is 25 minutes long.   Wow by the time I was done with that one, I was really sweating and feeling fantastic!!! Wow I forgot how much I love to do those videos whoooooooo.

I'm so glad I found Corinne and the Phit-N-Phat site again.  I logged in my food for the last two days for this team I'm part of and she said sweetie, you are not eating enough for a sedentary person.  You need to be eating 10x your body weight on days that you exercise for any duration or intensity.  Preferably intensity as going by duration can have you working out 48 hours to burn the same calories you can burn at a high intensity rate in a much shorter time.  On days without exercise 1,800.    OKAY this goes so against everything I had learned, against what I had done before but maybe that's why I plateaued for so long back then and then lost the drive (there were other reasons too).  It even goes against the calorie count I got from a famous doctor's challenge for 2011 - I won't name names.  They gave me 1,251 calories a day for weight loss based on my height, weight, lifestyle.  Corrine says that is the formula she uses for her clients that are over 200 pounds.  After that she adjusts the ratio again.  But she said look at this way, if I was eating 1,200 or even 1,600 calories now to lose weight, it can be done, but when I get down to 190 pounds I'll have to drop even lower and lower in order to get results and once I got even lower but not yet at goal, I'd practically be starving to lose a pound and that lifestyle is hard to live with. You know it started to make sense.   If what we have believed all along worked so well, we wouldn't be a fat nation.  Fat people do not all pig out and overeat all the time as some people might think (obviously there were some issues that got them there though including overeating).  But many now, wanting to lose a little will drop their calories and hardly eat as much as the skinny person at the next table.   (I'm not making generalizations I'm just saying it does happen like that sometimes).  I do remember when I first started Weight Watchers a few years ago, I had to struggle to get in all my points that day.  Having less points didn't mean weight loss.  Eating enough meant weight loss.  So for now, I'm following Corinne's advice for the next few weeks and we'll see what kind of results I have.

But man, what a great day.  I felt such a rush of feel good endorphins when I finished.  I did it! And a few hours earlier I was depressed thinking I couldn't do the tougher workouts again yet.   Its all in our freakin heads really.  Look at what the people on Biggest Loser can do.  They are heavier than me and I never hear Bob say "program that treadmill to 3mph". No he says "program it to 7, now 8 for 1 minute, that's it now 10".    No, I don't have professional trainers and doctors standing by in case I faint and fall off the treadmill.  But I can certainly push myself beyond my preconceived boundaries.

"It doesn't count unless you sweat!"

Day 12 - pound for pound challenge & chicken soup for the soul

Day 12
sigh
Weight: 232.4 (+.4) (it happens - I know its because my body is making adjustments and not because I made bad choices)
Fat: 55%  so that goes down and my weight goes up (I'm not getting in enough exercise to think I'm building muscle much yet, maybe its water retention).

However, I did find this neat website that takes your measurements as well to give you your Fat % and BMI which I'm hoping is a bit more accurate.
According to  http://home.fuse.net/clymer/bmi/
My stats are: Fat 43.7 % and BMI 41.2

I joined The Biggest Loser Pound for Pound Challenge - I might as well help out the local food bank while I'm on this journey.  For every pound I lose, 11 cents is donated to the food bank which can get them a pound of food for distribution. I haven't quite figured out if its just the pounds I pledge or if I actually let them know how many pounds I lose.  I'd rather it be that I have to track my progress but we'll see.


So the scale has gone up slightly the last two weigh ins.  It's possible I'm not eating enough calories, so if its the same tomorrow again, I'll up my calories a bit with more protein and see if that makes a difference.  I also have to take into consideration that I'm 42 and I may not lose weight the same way I have in the past.  Although in the past I didn't do it in such a healthy way. I'm more balanced this time, at least that's what I like to believe.

Activity today: 25 minutes on the treadmill and cleaned the workout area in the basement for about 1/2 an hour, moving alot of things around and reorganizing.

I'm not feeling quite as good as yesterday but I still think I'm getting healthier and getting over this sickness.  Hope so.

For food, I did pretty good today.  1/2 a yogurt, 1/2 a pb sandwich on ww bread, 1 cup of OJ, lunch was a spinach and lettuce salad with chicken no dressing (believe me, I like it like that.  I usually go without dressing, it ruins the salad for me). Dinner homemade chicken soup :))) yummy (I plan to make soups more often because I get my veggies that way easier). Snacks: an apple, herbal popcorn, grapes.  Almost all of my water.

Do you think I'm strange that I'm looking forward to shoveling snow tomorrow??? Its a great workout! :)

Day 11 - rounding the bend and new challenges

Day 11
Weight: 232 (up .2 from the other day :( )
Fat %: 56.4% (okay I swear that thing said like 55 last week - not sure if I trust that part of the scale but it reads what it reads for now)
Calories for the day: approx 1,430 (highest I've had in a while) darn tacos

Finally woke up feeling better, I could breathe through my nose -that was a start.  Throat feels better too.  So I'm on the mend finally.  I would have been making a doctor's appt today if I woke up feeling like I did the last few days. 

I made myself have something for breakfast (whole wheat bagel flat w/ reduced sugar grape jelly).  You know those bagel flats from Thomas aren't half bad - still kind of chewy so you get the same texture and taste as a regular bagel but less than half the size and only 110 calories -sweet!  Made myself eat because I sometimes skip it which is very detrimental to a weightloss goal.  I had planned to take a salad for lunch and if I hadn't had something for breakfast, by the time lunch rolled around ~~ that salad wouldn't have cut it :).
Snacks today weren't too bad.  A serving of pretzel sticks, a clementine, a FF SF fudgicle ugh, and an apple. Yay me on the apple because my FGT (FGT=fat girl thinking) said the fudgicles are only 60 calories you could have another one but I consciously thought about it for a moment and decided to have the apple instead.  I could have done without the extra 40 calories (could have done without any snack really but baby steps baby) but apples are a superfood and a "clean eating" snack icon.

Activity: treadmill for 30 minutes and I said I'd do some weight training tonight but not feeling the mojo.  Wish I had my regular workout area again downstairs.  I will work on having more space than just for my treadmill.   When I'm on the treadmill I can see the posters I had up when it was like a gym down there 3 years ago, I can see them behind the boxes and other misc. items that have creeped into my previous gym space, its frustrating.  One - not having the space (honestly there's not much room left to move those items into so I can have my space.  Two - I want to be back to 100% health so I can really do some heavy workouts without making myself sicker.  I'm still pacing and I really dislike that.

I located a couple of old online groups today, that I used to be a part of when I was last on this journey and rejoined. Phit-n-Phat and a Yahoo Group "Weight Loss Group Support".
Here is my new ticker :) for my short term goal to get to 200.  Then I'll create a new one.



I try to make this journey as fun as possible to keep me motivated.  I've joined one challenge on the Phit-n-Phat site New Year New You Phat Team - the goal is to lose 8 pounds in 8 weeks (doable) I've already lost 4 and since I'm on week two and they are on week two I think that qualifies :) Maybe I better ask.  I was thinking of joining their Push Ups Challenge but ... maybe I better wait till I get some time in exercising consistently before I go jumping into any big challenges lol.  Right now, consistency and balance is the challenge.

Short Term Goals:
To get to 200 pounds
Start planning my meals a week in advance doing advance food prep
Consistently workout 4 times a week.

Long Term Goals:
To fit into a size 8, no matter how many pounds that is.
Consistently eat clean, plan my meals and prep.
Work out 6 days a week, constantly challenging myself to new levels.
Develop a new lifestyle and bring my family into with me with the least resistance possible. :)

Day 10- treadmills and cayenne

Day 10
Weight: didn't weigh in today (feeling miserable - just can't beat this fricken cold/sinus infection/sore throat whatever it is that changes day by day but isn't going away). 
Fat %: didn't check it but I know its over 50% its been about 55% this week.
Calories: I barely have over 1,000 and its after 10pm.  I just haven't felt that good, to even want to eat.

I'm not sure if I'll post normally in the morning about the day before, or at night about that day.  For now I'll write about today.

Woke up feeling crappy, think my sickness peaked and hopefully I'm on the mend.  I started my day by finishing looking through my new mag Oxygen that I bought last night.  I absolutely love this magazine.  There is nothing sexier than a strong woman.  The women in this magazine are not just physically strong but mentally as well as they dedicate themselves to healthy eating and exercise.  Its exciting to think that I'll be working on my muscles again soon.  Next to fitting into smaller sizes I think the definition of muscle tone is the most exciting part to getting fit. 


Even though I was working out with weights before, I still got the dreaded bat wings (in case you don't know - that's the excess skin that hangs down from your arms when you are losing weight faster than your skin can shrink) I hated it but loved the definition I started to have in my shoulders and legs.  I'll have to be extra vigilant with the arm work for toning.  I wonder if that is how the people on the biggest loser avoid getting that.  Because they lose it fast!! However, I know they do alot of resistance training.  I have a few of the Biggest Loser workout videos and man they can be tough, but it feels great when you finish one.

So after I read the magazine, I looked at some other papers I had saved - lots of good workouts and inspiring stories.  I found a notice about a support group.  Supporting people in their quest to lose weight, weekly weigh ins and measurements, group exercise, coaching, a weekly fee of $1, babysitting by an experienced 13 year old in the home, and a $ prize at the end for the one who lost the most weight.  It sounded so cool and then I realized I had written that 8 years ago.  My friend Tammie and I had been exercising and losing weight and inches and wanted to open it up for others.  Not sure what happened to make that not ever happen or why we ended up stopping and gaining the weight back.  Life I suppose, it was right after I had had my son, he would have been 1 at the time.  My daughter was the 13 year old who was going to babysit :)  I was in awe at how driven I was to help inspire and support others.

I checked the dates on the workout pages I had saved and some were from 2007.  Ah that was the last time I got serious about weight loss and lost over 70 pounds. Boy was I on a roll, had completely changed the way I ate and approached exercise - I was like a machine.  What happened???? I'll blog about that later.

I decided to get on the treadmill tonight and did a bit over 20 minutes, a mile and burned about 150+ calories.  Not my best by far, but was just enough and hopefully it wont set me back in regards to this sickness.

So food today was okay calorie wise, not the very best choices but I'm trying to be easy on myself. For dinner I had sweet potatoe fries with cayenne pepper (in the hopes that the pepper would help clear my sinuses - well it made my nose run a bit and burned my throat a little).  By the way, if you want to make your own sweet potatoe fries, here's what I do.  Preheat oven to 425 degrees, wash one sweet potatoe, cut into fries leaving the skin on, pour 1 tbsp of olive oil on the baking sheet, toss the fries onto the pan and roll them around in the olive oil, sprinke with chili powder (I added cayenne tonight but don't usually) and roll them again so both sides are oiled and powdered, bake for about 20 minutes-25 minutes and enjoy!  Delicious.  If you eat the whole potatoe yourself you are looking at about 240 calories oil included.

I've been given the hint alot recently to start writing so here I am.  I put in my logbook for fun activity - starting this blog.  I haven't meditated today and should try to do that before I go to bed.  I feel that was my downfall before, not keeping a balance.  So to make a lasting change I have to find balance with my body, mind and spirit so that I can stick with this for the rest of my life.

I'll take my measurements tonight so I can start tracking them weekly. 
Namaste'

How I lost 1.6 pounds in less than 2 hours

LOL, okay this was strange and made me wonder about exactly what our bodies go through in the morning.  The other day (day 6 of my journey to be exact).  I woke up about 7:30, went to the bathroom and er did #1 only giggle (I only share this because it makes what happened even more strange).  So I got up, relieved myself of some liquid and hopped on the scale 235.2.  WHAT? I had gone up 1.8 pounds from the morning before.  Okay okay calm down, back to bed for awhile. 

I began to read over my log book to see what might have caused this sudden and big jump back up.  Okay, the day before I had ramen noodles for lunch (poor planning but only 190 calories) however it is very very high in sodium and I had drank a good amount of water that day too.  So I looked at the day before and saw that I had had pizza for lunch (didn't have time to pack one and my son was with me at work so we ordered pizza) and I hardly consumed 2 glasses of water all day {the excess sodium from yesterday and lack of water the day before that most likely caused me to retain excess water}.  So it could be the downfalls of those two days (yes I can be a tough on myself) and/or the increase in physical activity (I had started to workout on the treadmill this week).  I then proceeded to read until about 9. 

At 9 I went into the bathroom and took a shower (didn't use the toilet again) and got on the scale.  I'm not sure why I felt compelled to do that but I did and I'm glad I did lol.  It read 233.6 I had gone back down 1.6 from that morning.  Phewww

Okay, but then I also had gone up .2 from the day before.  Let's see increase in exercise, body will hold water a bit for the first couple of weeks and then my food choices for the last two days ... okay I can accept a .2 increase.  Then I remembered when I was on this journey before a small increase like that when I was doing relatively good, meant I had a good drop coming within two days.  I put that out into the universe and told a couple people.  Yup I went up a bit today but expect a significant drop within 2 days.

Next day - down.4 and the day after that - down 1.4.  :)))

Does it seem like I'm getting too overboard on the details? I thrive on details - always have so I'm in my element.  I just love to watch how my body reacts to different situations and be able to predict what it will do.

But really just what did my body do internally to drop 1.6 pounds in less than 2 hours.  I did nothing, didn't drink any water, didn't go to the bathroom, didn't exercise nothing.  Strange but fascinating too.  At least I think so.

Here's a pic for any guys that may peruse my blog :)